Hunger…Up-close.

We tend to ignore many aspects of our life until time brings our attention to it. We apply the same logic to almost everything else. Its not just you and me..our friends do it, our company does it, our govt does it.. almost everyone.. except Mother nature. Well that has been discussed. 🙂

There are some things that we try to ignore. We do succeed.. or at least we think we did.  Ignoring beggars is one among that.

Everytime I travel, there has not been one single time when I never saw or came across a beggar. My country’s economic divide provides me with ample opportunities to come across a lot of homeless, penniless,food-less and faceless people who beg for a living. As a kid, I used to think a lot about them. But now, things have changed.. I get this ‘sudden’ feeling as an adult – “They are everywhere!” right from Traffic signals to temples to trains. 😐

I have always to know how these people end up here. What rotten coincedence in their lives would have brought them all to the streets? Why them in particular? Do all of them have names? How do they feel when someone calls them with their name? Howlong is their day? rotting every second in the hot sun and lashing rain. What is their life to them, if not an anathema?

It was a normal train journey. I was at the station well ahead of the train. Bought something to eat and stuffed it into my bag for the night. Got onto the train and started engaging myself, repeating inside not to take note of anyone else in the compartment… trains are now dangerous places… there are very few good ppl out there. A small conversation and that s it!! ppl plunder you in some way, either in the form of robbery or some shameless favours. A lonely feeling in a train can be quite inconvenient.

I munched through my packet of fried noodles,  😦 with the help of a spoon, without even putting it out to a plate, due to lack of space and some really insensitive co-passengers. 🙂 At the corner of the Compartment was seated a small girl dressed in a very old chudhidhar and sporting some messed-up eyes. She looked half like a poor girl salvaging some dignity and half like a beggar. I bravely tried to ignore her and ate what was a really horrible combination of bad oil and old-dough. Beyond a limit, I QUIT. I couldn’t take in anymore! I got up, to dispose what remained out of the window and the girl lifted up her hand and cried ‘ANNA!’.

I was stunned. I had to make a choice. Do I feed a poor hungry girl or not let her eat my food remains?  #-o In reality, it took me less than 2 seconds to hand over what I had to her. I had to. Hunger is a terrible thing. It showed on her face. That second just froze in my mind. I literally crawled back to my place. She slowly let her hand in the packet and started eating… just like she would eat at home after her mother scolds her. I could not look back into her face…it is a grim,melancholic feeling. You start thinking of hunger all around, when you see it in all it’s dark form. 😐

The rest of the journey left me completely alone. None of the pesky idiots in my coupe’ were there, no train track sounds, no boredom…. there I was…. alone. COMPLETELY.